#don't know how to tag

[aplaceinme]

Here's the thing… all the people saying that if buddie doesn't become canon this season, they won't watch anymore, are straight up lying lol They have been doing this since s2!

So, here's my experience with shipping buddie and seeing people going crazy over them since s2! (I started watching the show live since the second half of s2).

The moment that made me realize that this people were just TOO MUCH and that I was going to step aside a bit and just enjoy the ship without looking for 'clues' and theories, etc., was after “Eddie Begins”.

After that episode, everyone and their mother were saying that 'there's no heterosexual explanation to the way Buck reacted'. And I was like, what do you mean? Yes, there fucking is! So, I asked one of the big blogs if they truly wouldn't react that way if what happened to Eddie happened to a close friend of them. Their answer? “No, I wouldn't, only if I had feelings for them.” And the rest of them agreed with that.

And I was just [insert the guy blinking meme] What do you mean? What type of friendships do you have?!?

So, I pretty much stayed away from speculation and things like that. I just continue to watch the show, and reading fics.

But, obviously, I would still end up seeing a lot of things.

This is what the pattern has been since s2 till now (and it will for sure continue for however many seasons there are of the show):

Big buddie blog makes a post speculating about when buddie will become canon. To do so, they use different theories: couch theory, Oliver's social media theory, color theory, what they are wearing theory, what song is playing theory, the way they shot the scene theory, the way the light/sun was in that scene theory, etc. etc. They would also use the interviews (which they would twist as much as possible so that it would fit their narrative). If someone said, 'buddie is not going canon' then it means that it's obviously becoming canon bc they can't say it will, they won't spoil the show. And if someone said sth positive about Buck and Eddie's friendship, it also meant buddie canon. Basically, they would make the posts with absolute certainty that buddie was going to happen that X season.

All the rest of the buddie fans, would see those posts and theories and would eat it right up. They would reblog and be excited to watch the episodes because at any moment, buddie would be canon.

The first half of a season ended without even a hint of buddie happening anytime soon.

People would go to the big buddie blogs and asked them why they lied? How can they explain what happened? What does it all mean?

The big buddie blogs would make a post saying: "Guys, I was just speculating and theorizing as one does in fandom. Just having fun. I've never promised anything. I'm going to step away from my blog from a while because I don't deserve those asks."

Two days later, they would make a post again, this time saying, "Guys, I've thought about it. And don't give up hope, buddie is so becoming canon in the next half of the season. We have to remember this a slow burn. They have left us all of these clues (insert everything I put in the number 1 point). By the end of the season, buddie canon! Also, Oliver wants it!"

Everyone would buy it again, and would watch all the episodes of the last half of the season expecting buddie.

Buddie would not happen.

Repeat point 4

Repeat point 5

Repeat point 6, but adding that it was going to be the next season.

Repeat all the points over again.

During all of that, they would threaten to quit watching the show if buddie didn't become canon (this has been happening for years and they have never quit, unfortunately!), they would say that it is queerbaiting, they would hate Tim and Kirsten and x writer and x somebody. They would obviously hate on any love interest and the actresses that were playing them.

Some other things that happened:

When the will episode happened, and Eddie used Evan instead of Buck, they all freaked out. It was romantic, and of course Eddie was the only one to use it (besides Maddie). So many fics were written with Eddie using Evan. So, really the only reason they are upset about Tommy using Evan is because Tommy is the one doing it and not Eddie.

When everything with Ryan happened, Oliver and Ryan stopped following each other on Instagram and both of them even deleted pictures of the other. What did the big buddie blogs say? “Oliver and Ryan are professional actors, even if they hate each other now, they will still have to act in love when buddie happens. This situation is not going to change that from happening. They have to do what the script and Tim wants, so…buddie canon!” Therefore, them saying that Oliver hates Lou and so bucktommy will break up, it's once again bullshit because in their own words: “they are both professional actors so it doesn't matter what they feel for each other.”

Pretty much every single thing that they hate about the bucktommy storyline, every single that they complain about, it's just because it is happening with Tommy. If Eddie had made the 'God, I hope so' line, they would have been all over it, writing fanfic and everything.

Honestly, there are probably more things but right now this is all I can think about.

Right now, because of everything that happened, I don't longer ship buddie (obvious if you see my blog). I could have happily been a multishipper and love both buddie and bucktommy, but they have absolutely ruined buddie for me. I can't even read fanfic of them anymore.

[yallemagne]

Queer.

Every so often, the same fucking post roles up on my dash. And since it's Pride Month? You know what it's about.

Now, I will be frank, any time I see someone crying "you can't use queer for yourself because I don't want to be called a slur!!!" I do roll my eyes, though that doesn't mean I don't understand the concept.

When I didn't even know who I was, I had plenty of terms thrown at me that didn't fit. People didn't know what to call me so usually they just called me gay. I didn't like being called gay because it wasn't who I was. Gay implied something about both my gender and my sexuality that wasn't true... but I didn't know the truth yet. I could hardly correct people.

Eventually, I figured out that my ambivalence to either gender didn't mean I was bi without a preference but that I was asexual. I explained this to people who would try to categorize me as gay, "No, actually, I'm asexual.", and I would then explain the concept of asexuality. This led to sexual harassment. Getting dressed in the locker room and being told what sexual positions people imagined me in and with whom. Being made to feel like I was the pervert in those situations.

And now saying I'm ace still gets a similar response just from what I hope is a more well-meaning crowd.

"Well, ace people can have sex/want to have sex. Are you sure you're not demi/greyace? You've never even tried sex, so you don't know." Congrats for vaguely understanding the concept of a spectrum. I personally use the dictionary definition of asexual, so I do not partake in sex nor desire to.

"Well, ace people can date/want to date. You have to say ace/aro or I'll just assume you're heteroromantic." No, because for me, unless explicitly stated otherwise, asexual and aromantic are a package deal. You wouldn't demand this same clarification from someone of any other sexuality.

It's a frustrating situation where even when I am clear and using a community-approved label for myself, I am still sexualized and pressured into seeking a relationship, and it puts me back into the mind of the kid who was bullied in the locker room. That doesn't mean that ace people on the opposite side of the spectrum or with different romantic attractions are my enemy. It just means we're different, and it's lovely that we're different, and the people who attempt to weaponize the speculative chance that an ace person might be down to fuck in order to pressure that person into sex are the real assholes.

I didn't know I was trans for the longest time because gender-nonconforming trans people were paraded around as freaks and the gender-conforming ones were just barely safe from scrutiny so long as they weren't associating with those people. But I eventually figured out that I'm genderqueer. I tend to say trans-masc nonbinary, but a more encompassing label might be genderqueer, and I drop the "gender" part and say queer because it embodies my gender identity and sexuality paired together, not separated into neat little boxes.

From my own queer perspective, the frustration with being told not to use the word queer is that we either have to pick from the four most recognizable labels (lesbian, gay, bi, and trans), dip into the bargain bin of obscure and often unaccepted labels, or make up something new. We're often told that we don't fit into the big four categories, that we are a disgrace to those. Obscure labels constantly have to be explained, and people turn their noses up upon hearing them. And making up a new label always has the risk of it being swept from under us and us being told by our more "acceptable" counterparts: "Your identity offends. Change it."

People saw my gender presentation and lack of interest in dating and picked words they already knew to describe me, and since those words didn't fit me, I felt even more isolated in a time when I needed support. I got my hair cut in middle school, and it was like I was finally moving in the right direction. My friend saw and the first thing she did was laugh at me, calling me a dyke. That does not give me the right to tell dykes "Hey! That word hurt me! You have to use the softer word "lesbian" instead." Besides, it wasn't the word, it was the intent of the person who threw it at me.

No one reclaiming the word queer is using it as a slur, but we are villified and told "That word hurt me! Use a softer word!" And I have to ask: is it really any one of you non-queer-identifying individuals' business? You see someone in the process of loving themselves and finding themselves in a diverse community, and you want to shatter that because you were hurt before? That's villain origin story shit. You want to poison the well because if people are allowed to call themselves queer more people will know the word queer and think it's okay to say and randos will think that you are queer and use queer to describe you when you're actually lesbian, gay, bi, trans, whatever label you prefer. But just because someone might misidentify you doesn't mean other identities need to be pushed back into the closet.

And of course, some are upset because people say Queer Community and it's called Queer History rather than being separated out into Gay History, Lesbian History, Bisexual History, Trans History--- but dude? You can still say LGBT or LGBTQ or LGBTQIA+ (though, if you hate the word queer, I guess you'd only accept the first acronym?) when referring to the community, and people will NEVER stop using the acronym. You aren't being run out by us scary queer people with our nasty labels, YOURS STILL EXIST AND YOU ARE STILL FREE TO LABEL YOURSELF AS YOU PLEASE. Does that mean no one will ever unknowingly group you in as queer when you're not comfortable with it? No. But... I'm sorry... but fucking suck it up.

You aren't queer? Okay, yeah, I accept that. I am queer. That doesn't make you a good person and me a bad person or vice versa.

[rryeongchaes]

I have decided to finally cave and make a tumblr. Drop me a message in my inbox if you want to talk to me about my works! Or throw me any random Itzy thought! Always down to talk about these five girls or kpop ggs in general.

Will do my best to keep active on here while I work on stuff over on ao3 (ryeongchaes_plant). It will mostly be me posting about how much Ryujin and Chaeryeong occupy my brain :D

-RCP

[vaicomcas]

A friend found this abandoned teddy bear underneath a pile of junk exercise equipment today, and I don't know if I'm projecting or what but have you ever seen a teddy bear so crestfallen- (and wearing a half-torn tag that used to say "warning")

[hoardicboy]

[Image Id, a flag with two light blue striped have bumpy edges, and 4 stripes below or above the light blue stripes that go dark blue, blush red, dark blue, blush red, with a thick black stripe in the center ID end] [ID help is nice!]

Littleboyliker

When one's gender is a little boyliker, or little and uhmmm ummm men men boys you like boys you're a boy liker you like kissing men on the lips, blushing and boys men kissing boys men uhhhhh loving boys

@luvlybunii, maker of genderlittle and @donniesbf maker of genderboyliker

[rosieparker1856]

I was feeling not great and was scrolling through my Tik Tok and found this video my friend had sent me. It was a number to a "Pep Talk Hotline" set up by kindergartners and I was like 'I couldn't feel worse than I do now so may as well give it a shot'. I called it and it was the cutest thing ever and genuinely made me feel so much better. Thought I'd share my experience and the number soooo.... (707)-873-7862

[confusedgeckotree]

Intro Post

Hi! I go by Gecko, Felix, Líf/Lífþrasir or Bleu. I am genderfluid and prefer they/it pronouns right now but he/him, fae/faer, ae/aer, ne/nim/nyr, and occasionally she/her vibe too. they change all the time but i am trying to keep em updated-ish(its 5/5/2024 rn). I'm active on DeviantArt(BleuberrytheFox) and discord(geckotree59), but sometimes I throw random thoughts here!

Presently, my brain rot is mostly Rainworld, The Magnus Archives(/TMAGP) and the Mechanisms focused, yippee

I still have no idea what I'm doing, but I'm figuring it out

Also I used to be THESKETCHTWOLF.52 and later Bleuberrythefox on the warrior cats and wings of fire FANDOMs, so if you knew me from way back when feel free to say hi lol

[achtungmandatory]

Wow, that hurt

strained

[fox-bright]

I am never going to be able to leave Reddit.

[luckyladylily]

So a few months ago there was the discourse about would you rather meet a man or a bear in the woods. I didn't want to touch it while the discourse was hot and everyone dug in hard because those are not good conditions for nuance, but I waited until today, June 1st, for a specific reason.

I'm not going to take a position in the bear vs man debate because I don't think it matters. What is really being asked here is how afraid are you of men? Specifically, unexpected men who are, perhaps, strange.

People have a lot of very real fear of men that comes from a lot of very real places. Back when I was first transitioning in 2015 and 2016, I decided to start presenting as a woman in public even though I did not pass in the slightest.

I live in a red state. I knew other trans women who had been attacked by men, raped by men. I knew I was taking a risk by putting myself out there. I was the only visibly trans person in the area of campus I frequented, and people made sure I never forgot that. Most were harmless enough and the worst I got from them was curious stares. Others were more aggressive, even the occasional threat. I had to avoid public bathrooms, of course, and always be aware of my surroundings.

I know how frightening it is to be alone at night while a pair of men are following behind you and not knowing if they are just going in the same direction or if they want to start something - made all the worse for the constant low level threat I had been living under for over a year by just being visibly trans in a place where many are openly hostile to queer people. You have to remember, this was at the height of the first wave of bathroom law discussions, a lot of people were very angry about trans women in particular. My daily life was terrifying at times. I was never the subject of direct violence, but I knew trans women who had been.

I want you to keep all that in mind.

So man or bear is really the question "how afraid of men are you?", and the question that logically follows is "What if there was a strange man at night in a deserted parking lot?" or "What if you were alone in an elevator with a man?" or "What if you met a strange man in the woman's bathroom?"

My state recently passed an anti trans bathroom bill. The rhetoric they used was about protecting women and children from "strange men", aka trans women.

Conservatives hijack fear for their bigoted agenda.

When I first started presenting as a woman the campus apartment complex was designed for young families. The buildings were in a large square with playgrounds in the center, and there were often children playing. I quickly noticed that when I took my daughter out to play, often several children would immediately stop what they were doing and run back inside. It didn't take me long to confirm that the parents were so afraid of "the strange man who wears skirts" that their children were under strict instructions to literally run away as soon as they saw me.

"How afraid are you of a strange man being near your children?"

I mentioned above that I had to avoid public bathrooms. This was not because of men. It was because of women who were so afraid of random men that they might get violent or call someone like the police to be violent for them if I ever accidentally presented myself in a way that could be interpreted as threatening, when my mere presence could be seen as a threat. If I was in the library studying and I realized that it was just me and one other woman I would get up and leave because she might decide that stranger danger was happening.

Your fear is real. Your fear might even come from lived experiences. None of that prevents the fact that your fear can be violent. Women's fear of men is one of the driving forces of transmisogyny because it is so easy to hijack. And it isn't just trans women. Other trans people experience this, and other queer people too. Racial minorities, homeless people, neurodivergent people, disabled people.

When you uncritically engage with questions like man or bear, when you uncritically validate a culture of reactive fear, you are paving the way for conservatives and bigots to push their agenda. And that is why I waited until pride month. You cannot engage and contribute to the culture of reactive fear without contributing to queerphobia of all varieties. The sensationalist culture of reactive fear is a serious queer issue, and everyone just forgot that for a week as they argued over man or bear. I'm not saying that "man" is the right answer. I am saying that uncritically engaging with such obvious click bait trading on reactive fear is a problem. Everyone fucked up.

It is not a moral failing to experience fear, but it is a moral responsibility to keep a handle on that fear and know how it might harm others.

[snakesong]

Aaaand title of Worst Household* Chore to do goes toooooooo...

Re-assembling the bed after washing the sheets.

Like, there are too many steps. I just want to sleep. But no, I have to wrestle several different fabric thingamabobs into place first.

(Doesn't help that I sleep with a weighted blanket and need to manhandle 20 pounds of sand and roll it into a duvet cover.)

*I currently live in a college dorm and do not have/need a kitchen. Consequently, the winner may change once I move into a place with a kitchen.

[phoenix-and-dragon]

Living at the edge of a village with a population of not even four thousand people is great but it is like microdosing being in a horror movie sometimes

[algrit]

I already love each one of them aswell as the whole movie oh my god

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem (2023)

[faggotisaacfloofs]

the person who helped today when I fell out of my wheelchair actually did a really great job, so I want to share in case other people wonder what to do. [Note: this is not universal, this is merely a suggestion from one person, every wheelchair user's needs are different! I am a person who uses a manual chair usually pushed by someone else who is also disabled.]

Scenario: you see someone in a wheelchair fall out of their chair, and you have the ability to help.

1. Approach and ask "are you okay?"*

2. Next question if they say no, are vague, or open to continuing conversation** is, "is there anything I can do to help?" Or "what can I do?"

If they say no to help, then that's the end, just leave and go do whatever you were doing!

If they ask for help or say they are mildly injured, ask "what would you like me to do?" And wait for an answer before doing anything! If they seem dazed or confused, they might have hit their head or had another medical event*, or they might just be like that due to regular disability. Be patient.

Do not touch the person unless they say to, or they are like, unconcious in the middle of the road, ya know?? Wheelchair users usually have conditions that mean being handled improperly can severely injure us, you could cause much more damage than the fall.

Some things they might need you to do:

Bring their wheelchair closer (mine went about 5 feet away after it dumped me)

engage the brakes of the wheelchair

hold wheelchair steady if it's an unsteady surface (mud, hill, ramp, wet, etc)

offer an arm for them to hold onto to get up (them grabbing you, not you grabbing them) or move another solid item closer for them to use (i.e. a chair) [only do this if you physically have the ability to!]

If the terrain is rough (i.e. a parking lot), they *might* ask you to push their chair to a more stable area once they are back in their chair

nothing

Something else

Do what they ask, NOT what you think would be helpful. If for some reason you have to do something (i.e. you can't stop oncoming traffic and need to get them out) ASAP, tell them what you plan to do

Keep in mind they might also be D/deaf, have a communication disability, be stunned after the fall, have a head injury, not trust other people, etc. Be patient and treat them as a person with autonomy and agency! They might need to just sit on the ground for a few minutes to recover before trying to get back in their chair. They might want everyone to leave them alone. They might ask you to call someone specific. Their chair might have broken and that can be extremely distressing. All of this is like if your legs spontaneously stop working when you're out and about!

A lot of wheelchair users (NOT ALL) have ways to get into their chair on their own once the chair is close enough and brakes engaged (but it's hard from the ground!). Here's what brakes look like on a lot of manual wheelchairs, in case they ask you to lock the brakes. They're levers on each side and pushing the lever pushes a bar against the wheel to hold it still.

ID: A manual wheelchair with the brake levels circled in red and labeled "user brake levers"

*There is also the possibility of course that a person fell out of their chair due to a seizure or other medical event, so that is why it is important to ask if they are okay. If you saw them hit their head, tell them so. If they had a medical event, follow protocol for that, I'm not gonna get into it here (thought I could).

**sometimes a person will be clear after the first question i.e. "I'm all good thanks" clearly means they do not need you to ask another question, you can just leave them alone. Keep walking and don't stare. A lot of the time people will be a bit banged up but be totally fine and able to manage on their own.

TLDR: Ask the wheelchair user if they're okay, then what they need, and then do exactly that, including leaving them alone. Thanks!

[sabertoothwalrus]

does science experiments on you (homoerotically)

[marshmellowtea]

i desperately need people to realize there's a difference between "women need to coddle (cis) men's feelings even when they're being misogynistic uwu" and "we shouldn't tolerate misogyny but actively keeping men separate from women and treating them like they're inherently dangerous to women is only going to worsen the problem (and also this mindset causes IMMEASURABLE harm to nonbinary, trans, and intersex people, who are already incredibly at risk right now)" and i need people to realize that NOW